Saturday, November 17, 2012

Requesting your Prayers and Thoughts

This may be the longest post I have ever made since I began blogging, which was late February of this year...so please bear with me.  :)

First of all, I am asking for your prayers and thoughts on my behalf.  I am in tears as I write this post.  I am 56 years old, a baby boomer....and it seems to get worse as I get older.  I suffer from depression and am on medication for it  that are not helping.  It is so easy for people to say "Cheer up." to others when they themselves are not depressed, but those of us who suffer from depression know that it isn't something that just goes away.  Thank you all for your prayers and thoughts, I really appreciate it.  I hesitated to share this, but I figured...hey, how else are people going to know who I am if I try to keep a smile on my face all the time?  :)  Sure, I try to be an upbeat, happy and encouraging person, but it is hard to be this way when I am feeling as down as I have been these days.  As a result of this downness, I am finding myself much more sensitive than usual.  Normally I am a sensitive person, but when I am NOT depressed I am more able to let things slide and don't take things to heart as much.  These days it doesn't take much to bring me to tears.  My thoughts are distorted and I just can't seem to shake the sadness.  The weather may be a factor, but I am not sure of this, since I have never been diagnosed with SAD (seasonal affected disorder). I am going to see a doctor about this next week...yes, a doctor, not my family doctor, as, sadly, he has been sick (physically) for the past few months.  I was told by the secretary this week that she has no idea if or when he will be back.  Thank you for listening, I really needed to get this off my chest.  I have to admit that I am a little embarrassed to post this, as I don't often share this much, but there it is.

Maya Angelou said, "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."  

Thank you for listening, and thank you so much for reading my blog.

The photos I am sharing here are ones that I took today on one of my walks.  






I was surprised to see this in English, as you don't often see English in Montreal.  LOL!  So there is no need for me to translate this.  Renaissance is the same thing as Goodwill.  It is called Renaissance in Quebec, which means "rebirth".  It is an organization that helps people to reintegrate into the work force.  People can donate clothing, household items and furniture.  The bins are found around Montreal to enable people to donate their used clothing.  For larger items such as furniture, the organization can come to your home to pick up usable items.

Thank you all so much for visiting me here.  I really appreciate your responses to my posts, which you can always do by clicking on the 'comments' link at the end of posts.

27 comments:

  1. Linda, hang in there. Maybe this doctor will have some suggestions for changes in medicine. Keep sharing because that is one way to get support and feel love. I will keep you in my prayers.

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  2. Rooting for you Linda! Hope you discover your way to get things manageable at least. I know people who have a lot of success with medication and I know a lot of people who have success changing what they eat or don't eat or other natural aids. I know this is not an easy road and it can be a very lonely one sometimes. I hope you continue to reach out... I felt your tender spirit through your blog which makes me care for you. Best , Penny.

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  3. I hope I didn't mess up this comment section I kept having troubles with my iPad... sorry if I did

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  4. Anonymous1:52 AM

    Linda, I hope things get better for you. I know what it feels like to suffer from depression and to have people not understand it. I hope when you do get to see a dr that they give you a medication that helps more than the one you are on. You are a kind and loving person and your posts on FB always cheer me up. I wish I could do something to send some cheer back to you. I hope God sends some sunshine, peace and love your way.
    Sandy

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  5. Depression is a tough one. The solar eclipse this week is said to disturb energies for several days either side, so that could be a factor. I send you prayers and blessings.

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  6. im so proud of u Linda for ur bravery in sharing what u are going thru..so many of use suffer in silence so then we feel we are all alone and no one else understands us. Keep reaching out ..we are all here to support u in any way we can even if just a few words to show u how much we care for u. Im so sorry bout ur doctor having health problems..but i hope that maybe a newer fresher dr on the scene may bring new things to light that may have been missed..u never know..each dr has their own way of doing things and their own knowledge..its sorta like a second opinion which is a blessing in disguise. Ive worked for drs all my life...so i know how one can be completely different and offer different gifts to a patient. Joining here in cyber space with friends definitely is a healthy start to getting out those locked in feelings inside..which does nothing for u when u dont let them out. i hope u can also find a support system where u live too..maybe ur doctor can suggest support groups in your area. Its good to be around others who understand. Grief counseling does help..and others have found great comfort in finding others who have the same sadness.. I will continue to pray that the LOrd sheds His Light on all ur dark places..that no sorrow can be felt when u are in His presence and surrounded by His Joy. May the Joy of the Lord be your strength <333 love jenny

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  7. You're a giver...so try to be a taker and accept the hopes for your recovery from depression that those of us who enjoy your blog are sending you.

    Don't be embarrassed to mention depression....try different medication....and we're here fror you.

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  8. Dear Linda: I'm so sorry that you've been down so much lately. I've been sort of chronically depressed in the past, maybe I still am to a small degree, but I've never sought treatment or even diagnoses. The only things that helped me were (MAINLY) the Lord, and just looking for what little pleasures I could find mixed through my day. Since I think that you already do the same, I have no advice for you (not that you needed or asked for any). I can tell you that people DO care, not just those of us who follow your blog, but also folks in your daily life who you may not even think about. I will continue praying for you and continue following your blog. My wife and I always wanted to visit Canada, but I don't think we'll make it. Your pictures are the next best thing. May God bless you, and please keep blogging. - Gorges

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  9. Mike Brailsford5:25 AM

    Keep holding on Hun, thinking of you.

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  10. Hi Linda. I too suffer from mild depression and mental illness runs in my family. I am not on any rx for depression but i did put myself on Sam-e in February. I really wanted to forego another rx if i could. I think it helps. The thing that helps me the most though, is associating with believers of Christ, and a relationship with my heavenly Father. He loves you very much. He can help with anything if you only ask. Dont discount though, that He works through drs and His many other helpers here on earth. I pray you find peace, and a calmness, and that you know you are loved. God is the greatest medicine you can get. When i get sad, or anget, or just dont know which way to turn, i sing the sunday school song, "Jesus loves Me, this i know, cuz the bible tells me so' ovet and ovrr and over...then believe. I hope it helps you too. Hugs! Michelle

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  11. Dearest Linda,
    Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving such sweet words in your comment behind for me to find today.
    I'm so sorry that my first visit to you is such a sad one. But as I'm reading through your postst trying to figure out who you are, it seems to me that you are just a dear and beautiful soul. It's just that you've seem to got a broken wing and you've got to let that heal. By a doctor or by friends or by passengers that fly by and leave words that embrace you as a blanket.
    I know how you feel (been there myself 13 years ago) so keep you words comming and do talk about it (even if you think it's kind a weird on blog which it isn't) it will only help you to see the YOU again.

    I wish you all the best, and may your days be filled with love to support you in these darker days. Know that the sun is out there for you too, you just need to open up and see, feel and enjoy it again.

    Be well.
    Hugs Dagmar
    ps. No strings attached but you might find it helpfull (as I did) to wear a nice rock/mountain crystal(I'm not sure this is the right word, but it's a gem) that helps you find strenght again.

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  12. Tom G.8:26 AM

    Linda, one thing you are doing is good. You are remaining active, going about taking photos. You can also find folks who need help in some way and help. And of course, you need to know and believe there is a God who loves you and folks in your present and past that care

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  13. Ah, I'm so sorry that you're feeling so badly. Depression is difficult, but perhaps it helps to share what you're going through with your family and friends, and yes, your blogging friends, too.

    I like your photos today very much. I'm wondering if Renaissance is the same organization as our Goodwill. I'll have to check it out.

    You'll be in my thoughts and I wish for you the very best.

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  14. Winter can be so grey, but you've spotted some color to share. Keep looking for your solultion until you find it.

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  15. I'm glad that you get out every day because I think that really helps when you're depressed. My roommate has depression and other issues and she has a special light for her Seasonal Affective Disorder. She's on prescription meds as well but it has brought her out of her slump. I hope your new doctor can find the right combination of therapies to help you back to a happy life.

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  16. You'll be in my thoughts

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  17. You know, Dear Linda, that I don't forget you. Even if the language is sometimes difficult and I need to translate words (if possible), I want to send you some...
    The only thing I can do extra today is send you some BIG HUGS !
    Lie(f)s.

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  18. Linda, I know what you are going through as I've been there. Talk to the dr. about the medication as the anti-depressants are many and varied. Not all react well.Myself, I take a good dose of vitamin D daily starting in the fall and try to keep busy with lots of exercise. Hang in there, we are all praying for you.

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  19. Dear Linda, I'm sorry to hear that life can be so difficult for you at times. I do feel like I share some common ground with you on this issue. I've never been diagnosed with anything, but I definitely have those moments of quiet desperation when I feel deeply depressed. Those pictures are great. Thank you. I'm glad you try to seek out the nature around you, as that probably contributes some peace of mind, even if some of the depression is still humming in the background. I want us to be joyful, but I've learned, and after reading your post I imagine you'll agree, that pretending not to have depression only makes things worse. I don't like to talk about it either, so I understand feelings of embarrassment. I suppose this is proof that women are more enlightened than men. lol :) There's nothing wrong with reaching out. I use meditation, spiritual teachings, etc... and I manage to get by, and sometimes to feel some kind of progress in my goals and hobbies, and other times I feel like I'm living a wasted life. In my spiritual pursuits I am realizing that these thoughts that we have inside ourselves are often not true, and I try to disidentify from that stream of consciousness that previously felt out of my control as I fully identified with those thoughts. Also I hear that Mercury is in retrograde, and I don't know what that means really, except people seem to dread a Mercury in retrograde, LOL ... I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
    Love,
    Jeremy

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  20. Keep taking those pictures Linda, that's what I do, and even the bad days, you can put in the "recycle bin".

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  21. Hi Linda. Thanks you for the information. That's kinda what I thought from your comments, but was curious enough to want to make sure. We give lots of stuff to our local Goodwill.

    Hope your Sunday is filled with fun!

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  22. I commend you for asking for our help. We will keep you in our prayers - - - plus hopefully encourage you with our words. It is good that you got outside and took a walk. If it is S.A.D., that will help some. Do you have a "Light Box" inside your home? My daughter bought one. She doesn't like the early, long dark evenings and felt like she needed more sunshine in her day so bought some!!! I pray the doctor you find will be a good one. Also, hope you can find a good Christian support group. Are you a Bible reader? It will help your focus - - - - however, I know that at "our age", depression can be a chemical disorder in our blood rather than just an outlook - - - so again, I pray you have a miracle working doctor. We do look forward to updates so please keep writing. You seem like a very nice person.

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  23. I have only just met you Linda but this post makes me realize how we all share so many of the same joys and hardships. Find comfort that many people feel the same way you do, keep looking for the light in life, get all the help you can and keep taking out the camera and going for your outdoor walks. I wish you peace and happiness :)

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  24. Thank you all so much for your kind and encouraging, comforting comments! I feel so much better now that I have opened up and shared this thanks to your encouragement, love and support. A heartfelt thanks to you all!

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  25. It is my hope, Linda, that you will find medication that will lift your spirits and banish the depression you feel. A swift and complete recovery would be terrific. One day at a time, I guess! Good luck.

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  26. Linda, thank you for trusting your blog readers enough to share with them what you are going through. There is a television advertisement here in the U.S. that says, "Depression hurts." That it does. It hurts and colors everything. Thankfully, I've never suffered much from it, but I have enough to know that it makes one just not able to do the things that one want to do. Depression also is a killer. I lost a daughter to suicide which was the result of a depression disorder. I wish she would have trusted others to tell them how she was feeling rather than putting on a happy face and working harder to try to take care of her problem herself.

    Take care of yourself. Continue to reach out. If the medication is not working, keep looking for the one that does. Those walks should help tremendously.

    I am sending thoughts and prayers your way. God bless you.

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    1. Hi Sally, thank you so much for sharing this with me. You have touched my heart! So sorry to hear about your daughter. God bless you as well, my friend.

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